‘Kid, get over it…’: Absent Uncle Shocked When Niece Refuses to Join Him on Week Long Vacation Due to Zero Contact for Over a Decade

Author image for Sienna Varady
Sienna Varady
Apr 15, 2024 8:00 AM EDT

Nothing is more important than family, but even so, it's important to think about what a family actually consists of. Is your family the group of people you value most, whether or not they are your biological relatives?

The story that follows is the account of a confused sister. Neither the Original Poster (OP) nor her spouse have a close relationship with either of their siblings. As a direct result of the strained relationship, the children rarely spend time with their aunts or uncles. Thus, you can understand OP's surprise when her sister reached out to ask her son to join them on a week-long trip out of state.

That being said, be sure to read the story below if you're curious about whether OP allowed her son to travel out of state with practically a pair of strangers! After you're done reading, don't forget to check out the story about the woman who unexpectedly arrived at her SIL's holiday home and spent the night there even though it was reserved for other visitors!

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  • 01
    All of our siblings will yell at us on these holidays about how our kid doesn't want to be around them in front of our kid. Mind you, they never call us or answer the phone we call them with the focus on our kid speaking to them. They don't come and see us. We only see them at the holidays.
    via canva
  • 02
    Aunt and uncles don't call or see their niece, is shocked the niece doesn't know/like them
    via u/betweenthepines0
  • 03
    Hey, so this is going on currently in my life and I just want to share the absurdity with someone else. My husband and I have a rocky relationship with both of our siblings. The reasons for it doesn't really matter for this situation as that is 30+ years of issues, but we both have on-off relationships with our siblings. When we planned to have a kid together, we didn't know if they would come around at all.
    via u/betweenthepines0
  • 04
    My sister has never been alone with my kid. Refuses to call or answer the phone. Does not speak to her more than just "hello." My kid talks to her boyfriend of one year more than her. My husband's brothers throw jabs about her dad and me to my kid. One comment: "Are you scared of me because Mommy makes you?" Constantly. My kid is 3 and they are talking about her parents to her.
    via u/betweenthepines0
  • 05
    All of our siblings will yell at us on these holidays about how our kid doesn't want to be around them in front of our kid. Mind you, they never call us or answer the phone we call them with the focus on our kid speaking to them. They don't come and see us. We only see them at the holidays. Not sure what we were supposed to do. I guess we needed to have a judge give them all a visitation schedule or something.
    via u/betweenthepines0
  • 06
    We do try to speak positively of our siblings to her (it's hard), but it's so exhausting because I am not sure how any relationship was supposed to happen because they hate us so much. Currently now my sister is angry because I won't let her take my kid out for a week to another state without my husband or me. She finally is taking an interest but to my kid, she is a stranger. I am not going to do that to her.
    via u/betweenthepines0
  • 07
    Just absurdity. Edit: Just want to say we are as low contact as we feel comfortable with them. My kid does not see the phone calls we make or hear their names unless she sees a picture of them and asks who it is. We make phone calls every 6 months or so for 2 reasons. 1.) Both sets of parents ask us to call and if we show proof we made "effort", the subject
    via u/betweenthepines0
  • 08
    is dropped faster. 2.) They have never answered a phone call in years. So there is no downside because we know they will not answer. We do not make these phone calls in front of our child and we do not mention it in front of her. We do only see them on Thanksgiving and Christmas, if they show up. We moved states so the accidental running into eachother
    via u/betweenthepines0
  • 09
    does not happen. We do not encourage or discourage the relationship. We say "This is your uncle/aunt (name)" and try to continue the day. We try to shut down any comments and I have left two years in a row because of the things said. d My sister is delusional for thinking she could t dad her way into using my kid as a prop. She forgot that my kid has no reason to be attached to her and she has no rights to my kid.
    via u/betweenthepines0
  • 10
    satansuglystepsis. 10 hr. ago Your kid is 3 and they want to take her for a week... out of state on top of that. Why????
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  • 11
    lightninghazard . 9 hr. ago To be a prop in vacation photos
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  • 12
    MidLifeEducation • 6 hr. ago No more calls! We have a winner!
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  • 13
    DecadentLife 8 hr. ago The fact that this would be remotely acceptable to them, shows you how much they are not equipped. I adore children. I spent my career on kids, and I loved it. I have no interest in taking an almost-stranger 3 year-old away from their parents for an entire week. How does it not occur to the woman that the 3-year-old is going to miss her parents? That should be a
    via u/DecadentLife
  • 14
    higher priority, the child's feelings. Obviously, the whole thing is ridiculous. But the sister is just showcasing exactly how poor of a decision it would be to allow her to take her three-year- old niece for a week.
    via u/DecadentLife
  • 15
    Dapper_Entry746 · 7 hr. ago Not Surprised When my closest niblings was three I wouldn't of wanted to take them out if state without their parents for a week! Emergency situation? Sure. Watch them at home while parents were gone? Uhm, sure [gulp nervously] Now that they're teenagers? All right! [laughs maniacally & activates Funnest Auntie Mode]
    via u/Dapper_Entry746
  • 16
    ThortheA Guardian · 10 hr. ago • Just cut these fools out. They don't even sound worth it. You're kids are smart to know/like them so little, so lean into that.
    via u/ThortheA**Guardian
  • 17
    • epossec 8 hr. ago My 2 sisters are 2 POS, I cut contact 20+ years ago. My quality of life went up so much, I decided I didn't want the same for my kids. To this day my kids don't know my sisters (their aunts) exist.
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  • 18
    When my kids see pictures of them at the grandparents' place, and ask my response is... Those are 2 ladies you are not missing anything for not knowing.
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  • 19
    betweenthepines0 OP. 7 hr. ago No need to go low-contact when the other person wants nothing to do with you. We only see them for Christmas and Thanksgiving anymore if they bother to show up. They just make a stink at those holidays. I heard about my sister's plan from my mom, and her blow up after from my mom when I shut it down. I am still hearing it from my mom and that was 2 months ago.
    via u/betweenthepines0
  • 20
    I just am amazed how three people can be so oblivious, self-centered, and mean that they could take out their anger towards us on a 3 year old. I am surprised each holiday, which is sad.
    via u/betweenthepines0
  • 21
    BlackShieldCharm • 6 hr. ago I would stop going do these family holidays, if I were you. They don't sound like they add anything positive to you life. If it's about seeing your parents (-in law), you can invite them or visit at a different date. There is no reason to invite this stress into your life.
    via u/BlackShieldCharm
  • 22
    Still_Actuator_8316 10 hr. ago Go mama bear protect your baby
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  • 23
    4xl0tl 9 hr. ago • I'm really sorry to hear about your situation. It may sound harsh first, but have you ever considered breaking off contact with your siblings for good? Being around them seems to be not at all beneficial for your child, nor you or your husband. I can't compare my own situation to yours, but maybe it's some kind of reference for you: I've
    via u/4xl0tl
  • 24
    never been close to my father's brother and his family, never really felt comfortable around the whole lot. So, once I was old enough to decide for myself, I started to excuse myself for any family gatherings at their place and once I left my hometown basically gone NC. Even on the rare occasions we see each other, I avoid them for the most part. TL;DR: If it's not necessary to see them, for whatever reason that might be, just don't. It can be very liberating.
    via u/4xl0tl
  • 25
    betweenthepines0 OP. 7 hr. ago We have limited contact with my sister. No contact would not happen. My sister and I's relationship is very rocky, but I love my sister even if I think she is an . I took care of her as a kid. I can't not be there if she calls me. But I will protect my kid from her wishy-washy attempts to be in her life and her callousness. That is not a problem.
    via u/betweenthepines0
  • 26
    My husband has finally limited his attempts to contact his brothers. We moved to get away from their snide and remarks. My kid will only see them on Christmas and Thanksgiving if they show up. Grey-rocking is hard, but the distance will make it easier. I have no idea if he will go no-contact, but I would be proud of him if he did.
    via u/betweenthepines0
  • 27
    . Rugged Hangnail 9 hr. ago · edited 6 hr. ago What positives do your siblings bring to your life? How are your child(ren)'s lives enhanced by knowing their aunts and uncles? It sounds like you and your husband have tried to have good relationships. You didn't break anything. You can't fix what is broken. No need to expose yourselves or your kid(s) to toxic people just because they share DNA.
    via u/RuggedHangnail
  • 28
    SweetieP1e75. 9 hr. ago I'm sorry you and your husband have to deal with people like this. Your sister is dulu if she seriously thought you were going to hand your child to essentially a stranger for a week without one of you there. Sure, I've taken my nephew abroad on holidays without his parents, but he knows me, I have been a constant in his life since birth, and he is
    via u/SweetieP1e75
  • 29
    completely comfortable with me. I have only just dropped my nephew back off after he came up to us for our school Easter holidays. We don't get to see him much during school year, but that's only because we live on opposite ends of the Country and I have a little boy in school as well, but as soon as they are out for the holidays I go get him. It also gives my brother a break since he is also a single dad.
    via u/SweetieP1e75
  • 30
    For a child to be that way, you have to be a constant in their life only which your sister hasn't been. Although I don't know your daughter, I figure she may not even allow it, as it would probably upset her to go without one of you being there. She may even refuse to go, which I would not blame her as it can be scary for even children that know there aunt, but being away that long can make them worried. I could only imagine what it would be like when the aunt is essentially a stranger.
    via u/SweetieP1e75

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oddly specific karens family drama entitled parents entitlement kids reddit story family feud petty sister subreddit Reddit family vacation entitled people vacation
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